The Gamesmasters of Æqueon!

Friday, Amœnus & Summersbane find themselves at the mercy of…the GAMESMASTERS OF ÆQUEON! Mighty Fluval & the wily Intern Kristie of RadioFreeMultiverse captured us whilst traversing the planes, & unless we play their little games, they shall DESTROY EARTH! Tune in—play along—for Earth hangs in the balance this Friday at 8PT!

If ye have yet to enjoy the sublime suffering of Grand Trivia—to undergo the joyous triviasformation—allow me to provide a few handy tips, to improve the chances of Earth’s survival…

Grand Trivia: A Survivor’s Tip-Hoard

Fluval—a dread power of the fifth dimension—delights in the art & suffering of TRIVIA. With his loyal (?) intern Kristie, each week they take a crop of willing trivialists on incredible journeys into KNOWLEDGE ITSELF. As an enjoyer of transplanar sport, I often myself play—below, find a few hard-won tips from my own vicissitudes of trivial fortune:

• Firstly, EXPECT TRICKS. Through wordplay, false premises, riddles, illusions, & general hoodwinkery, Fluval delights in both trick questions AND trick answers. Many a sorrowful petitioner has found their scores obliterated by a wrong move, by an unfortunate tendency to answer before fully digesting the question. REPEAT NOT OUR FOLLY.

• Secondly, EXPECT FORTHRIGHTNESS. For all his tricks, Fluval also fills each trivia with clear questions that have obvious answers—BUT, being so accustomed to the tricks, ‘tis easy to overthink the simple questions, & ace oneself out of points. Thus, the clarity itself BECOMES A TRICK. Most devious!

• Study MENUS. Particularly, from themed restaurants related to the trivia topic. From the Hobbit™: Desolation of Smaug™ menu at Denny’s™, to the dessert section of a dubiously-legal DC Comics café in Southeast Asia, menus & their poor copy are a staple of Grand Trivia.

• REMEMBER. Fluval—a wily being above matter itself—enjoys tormenting players by repeating questions, often in themes ye would not expect them, after so long that the answers become difficult to recall…unless, that is, ye sharpen thine ability to REMEMBER.

• Finally, GIVE THE CORRECT ANSWER. This sage advice comes from Fluval himself—so lucky lower beings are, to receive fifth-dimensional wisdom! Rather than give an INCORRECT ANSWER—& thus lose points—Fluval recommends the superior play, of simply choosing the CORRECT ANSWER.

I myself have emerged victorious in Grand Trivia more than once—yet also, I have set an enormous record for MOST POINTS LOST on a single question! I most often reach the end of a game, with zero points, but MAXIMUM HONOR, & thus, lose. Armed with the tips above, I hope—for Earth’s sake—ye achieve victory on Friday…I realize, ‘twould be easier, if ye knew the topic in advance & could study. If I knew, trust me, I would tell ye. But I am Fluval’s prisoner! I know as little as ye do! CUT ME SOME SLACK.

Thank ye for reading, mortals! & thank ye to the growing cohort of generous beings who can & do support our works here with coin.

I hope this special kidnapping crossover entices ye to join us Friday at 8PT for the GAMESMASTERS OF ÆQUEON! For the world hangs in the balance…’til then—be safe, be well, & be wary of the iconic CrowdPurr gong…

Cheers,
Amœnus Franco
Wizard, Writer, Hostage-Contestant