Ahoy, mortals! This Friday, join us in STUD CITY! Buoyed by our successes in Rohan, we travel the roads gathering allies—& what better champion than DOMINIQUE JOHNSON? (cohost of the wonderful Country Brothers podcast) Join us, Friday at 8PT on Twitch! Leave thy studfinders at home, they shall be obvious!! What a Beltane gift…until then, I present to ye the:

MAY FORECAST

Some newsletters bring ye news of what is—but in the Scriptorium, every month, we bring news of WHAT SHALL BE. Read on for the choicest items from my latest augury…

• This May’s overall aura is HAUNTING PURPLE FLAME. Beware all flames, lest they become PURPLE & HAUNT THEE.

• A nuisance CELEBRITY shall be in the news, but not for ANYTHING THAT MATTERS.

• Seven cats CHATTING, seven mice MUSING, but where are the SCONES?

• The POEM shall not make up for the DOINKING, regardless of its METER.

• COCA-COLA™ shall bring REFRESHMENT to a DYING REFUGEE [Sponsored Augury]

• A NICE YOUNG MAN shall have a LOVELY BIRTHDAY on MAY 4TH.

• NOBODY shall get laid on STAR WARS DAY.

• LEFT at the LIGHT, then WAR shall be on the CORNER.

• Expect many “OBJECTIVE” NEWS ANCHORS to suddenly have many VIOLENT OPINIONS about how to deal with PEACEFUL PROTESTS.

• NO GOOD MOVIES this month. Look again in 2099.

• MORE WAR. Sort of a “FREE SPACE” at this point, mortals.

• Lucky Numbers: 1-3-1-2

THUS ENDETH THE FORECAST. I hope this foreknowledge proves useful—& I hope ye shall join us Friday at 8PT in STUD CITY!

If we escape & survive the show Friday, I shall write ye again on Saturday with some fresh art & wizardry! I thank ye for taking the time to read, I thank all who have signed up to support our work with $5 monthly, & I hope May treats ye kindly! If not, I shall give it a stern talking-to.

Cheers,
Amoenus Franco
Wizard, Writer, Stud-Friend