Re-Booo-Nited

Wednesday’s greetings, mortals! This Friday at 8PT, after two harrowing weeks in the Samhain-Realm, Summersbane returneth & we shall be RE-BOOO-NITED! We fought our way through hauntings, hallucinations, & demonic Summersbanegängers—now we come triumphantly back together! Find out what Summersbane’s been up to Friday at 8PT on RE-BOOOO-NITED!

As we creep closer to Samhain, the realm seems to grow more vicious & agitated—its illusions become more frightening, & pointed:

Further Samhain-Realm Observations

The Woe-Form’s Hostility Grows as Samhain Nears

• Many warped bones, of hideous shapes & sizes, all engraved with the words “GUILTY”

• A hangin’ judge who sentences himself to hang, o’er & o’er

• Baby shoes, ne’er worn, full of screaming worms

• Baby worm shoes, ne’er worn, full of screaming bacteria

• The shade of Robin Williams, still stuck in a cage, still being jabbed by devils, but now he be forced to perform Popeye as a one-man show

• An æro-plane that crashes, o’er & o’er, with all the passengers screaming thy name for help, but ye cannot help

• Oil slicks ev’rywhere, with skeletal birds flopping in the goop

• A Hell-hound that barks at ye each time ye walk past, e’en though ye walk past all the time & the hound should recognize ye by now, & the owner comes out & yells at the hound each time, which just makes ev’rything louder & more stressful

• Pervasive odor of cheap, powdered parmigiano cheese

• She is there, & she is disappointed

• A mirage of Barack Obama lecturing a kitten against unionizing

• The ghost of Richard Nixon lecturing a kitten against Communism

• The spectre of Woodrow Wilson lecturing a kitten against not segregating the government

• There is a pinball machine, but ‘tis a pinball machine based on The Day The Clown Cried

• There is a book, but ‘tis the script of The Day the Clown Cried

• The ghost of the RMS Titanic, kissing the ghost of the iceberg that killed it, & they both have their eyes open & stare at thee whilst they kiss

• No candy

• An imp who follows ye around calmly stating facts about current sea temperatures & the rate of climate change

Thank ye for reading—& thank ye to the growing cadre of generous mortals who can & do support our works here with coin!

I hope ye shall join us this Friday when Summersbane & I be RE-BOOOO-NITED! I shall write ye again Saturday afternoon, in joy. ‘Til then—be safe, be well, & may ye ne’er encounter the spectre of Woodrow Wilson…

Cheers,
Amoenus Franco
Wizard, Writer, Increasingly-Spookèd