Notes from Goblin-Town

GREETINGS FROM GOBLIN-TOWN! Summersbane & I stayed here after the show to watch the Fall Trashic, & to part the night away with the superstars of Goblin sport! Slurs the Toilet (everyone’s favorite Goblin, a Goblin disguised as a dude) & Li’l Aiydenn (everyone’s favorite teen, loves Spider-Man) bestowed upon us two back-trash passes, so we could eat & drink the finest garbage ever discarded. They headed back up to the surface this morning to commentate & compete in the FIGHT OPERA SHOW, which can be watched RIGHT NOW, RIGHT HERE.

& if ye missed out on last night’s delights—which include some delightful faire stories from myself & Summersbane, and many revelations & headlines from Cynthia—ye may watch that as well, RIGHT NOW, RIGHT HERE.

Below, find the stats from the FALL TRASHIC, played last night, just after the show!

FALL TRASHIC YEAR 3,094 (GOBLIN-RECKONING)
GOBLIN-TOWN BASHERS VS. GOBLIN-COUNTRY TRASHERS

• DURATION: 3 HOURS

• FINAL SCORE: UNKNOWN (AUDIENCE VICTORY)

• TRASH-BALLS USED: 209

• FATALITIES: 47 (13 IN AUDIENCE)

• WEAPONS: YES

• FAVORED WEAPON: TRASH-TRUNCHEON

• MOST INTERESTING WEAPON: ANDURIL, FLAME OF THE WEST, REFORGED FROM THE SHARDS OF NARSIL (WIELDED BY SUMMERSBANE; 6 FATALITIES)

• BEER PRICES: $2 FOR A PINT, $4 FOR A PITCHER

• HOT DOGS: AVAILABLE IN BOTH PASTRAMI & NON

• CALF-CALLS: 4 (1 FATALITY)

• BEST TRASH FOUND: SMALL TRASH CAN FULL OF MORE TRASH

• WORST TRASH FOUND: A LIVE SENATOR

Truly, a rousing game! & we were told it paled in comparison to the Fall Trashic back in 3,007. I hope ye enjoyed the show, mortals! Thank ye to all who tuned in, who graced us with the gifts of bits & subs, & THANK YE to all of our readers et upgradors here in the Scriptorium!

I shall write ye come Monday with the first folio of a three-part Samhain adventure! Until then, be safe, be well, & keep Cynthia’s therapist in your thoughts!

Cheers,
Amoenus Franco
Wizard, Writer, Fall Trashic Survivor