Eternal Musical—Closing Night

Good afternoon, mortals! Thank ye for joining us last night—we wished to “go all-out” before heading to faire, & I think we accomplished the task. If ye missed our struggles against the concept of Musical Theatre—if ye missed our clashes with Captain Loop—if ye missed when Summersbane Defied Gravity—head to the replay, right here!

The dark lord Rum-Tum Tugger & his co-consul Broadway Beetlejuice thought they constructed quite a donjon for us—a ne’er-ending loop of musical theatre torment—& at first, we fought against it. But after reading through the playbill, I realized, the playbill itself told our tale, & contained within it the secret—to end the musical, we needed to BECOME THE MUSICAL.

But before we did, we heard snippets of many other musicals on the Plane of Rhyme—the plane from which, all music springs! Any song, poem, or musical show ye hear on Earth, originates from the Plane, filtered as echoes through the dreams of mortal minds. Below, find a few show descriptions & reviews:

Alexander Caveman
Echoed on Earth as “Hamilton”

“In this stirring hope-hop telling of the human species’ origin, we follow Alexander Caveman in his struggles to invent fire, the wheel, & fame itself.”
Runtime: 3.5 hours, no intermission. Note: Show makes use of fire & wheel effects.

“A vital piece of history, re-told for modern audiences.” — Neoliberal Critic
“I hate that everyone in the show isn’t white.” — Conservative Critic
“I just think it’s weird to make a fun show about the cavemen who invented slavery.” — Anarchist Critic

Went
Echoed on Earth as “Rent”

“A modern interpretation of the classic opera ‘Les Pieds Bohemme,’ this production follows the ins & outs of running marathons. From the distance that the characters went, to how quickly they went, fans of motion will be thrilled.”
Runtime: 7 hours, two intermissions.

“The lack of any romantic or sexual tension, meant they could really focus on where people went, & for how long. I liked it.” — 14-year-old audience member

Six-Titty Nine-Titty Sex
Echoed on Earth as “1776”

“Ribald, outrageous, & free from dialogue, this erotic display avoids all mention of politics, even when a character named ‘John Quincy Adams’ appears in Act IX.”
Runtime: 17 hours, no intermissions, open door policy.

Besus Christ, Superstar
Echoed on Earth as “Jesus Christ, Superstar”

“An exciting, musical exploration of the life of Besus Christ, as told through the eyes of his follower, Budas Biscariot. From the first days, to Budas’ final betrayal, the 1070s-style score carries us breathlessly through the greatest story ever told.”
Runtime: 2 hours, one intermission.
Content Warning: Some nudity; portrayal of brucifixion.

Thank ye for reading—& thank ye to the growing cadre of generous mortals who can & do support our works here with coin!

I shall write ye Monday with fresh art & a tale. ‘Til then—be safe, be well, & remember to thank the Tony commitee…

Cheers,
Amœnus Franco
Wizard, Writer, Starring as “Amœnus Franco”