A Journey to Kearney!

A wondrous Wednesday to ye, mortals! This weekend, we journey to the KEARNEY PARK RENAISSANCE FAIRE! ‘Tis our first appearance there, & our most Autumnal faire yet—we are honored to grace the stage at a faire with such a storied lineage! For tickets to the TWENTY-SEVENTH ANNUAL Kearney Park Renaissance Faire, simply point thy cursor right here!

Friday night, of course, we shall—as is our custom—present an especial BEHIND-THE-SCENES STREAM! Join us at 8PT, at the usual place, as we cruise the grounds for the first time!

Continue below for a fresh platter of ren faire advice—FALL-STYLE!

Among the ailing Imperium Americum’s West, most faires run during the drier—& thus, hotter—portions of the year. Sweat, dehydration, Sunstroke, all typical hazards—especially wearing garb for an era before devastating mortal-made climate change! But early November, in California’s once-lush Central Valley, presents a Goldilocks zone: not rainy, not hot, JUST RIGHT.

So, gleefully, we present:

AUTUMNAL FAIRE ADVISEMENTS

1. HYDRATE…Autumnally!: For any outdoor event, whatever the weather, hydration RANKS HIGHLY. But for a Fall-time event, embrace the season! Rather than simple water, why not bring something with a bit of spice? Mulled apple cider, mayhap? Hot cocoa? Or why not tea—known more wisely as, “mulled water?”

2. Wear Autumnal Sunscreen!: Aye, e’en in cooler cloudier times, the menacing rays of the hated Sun still penetrate—particularly ‘pon noses, cleavage, & other stick-outy areas of the frail mortal body.

3. Bring Seasonal Coin!: Not all faires contain working Automated Bank-Tellers, & not all vendors’ Inter-net connections function smoothly, so ‘tis always advisable in any weather to carry coin along. & for Fall-tide faires, carry seasonal coin! Quarters plated with acorn-flour, twenty-dollar bills bedecked with turkey grease, &c.

4. Jump Not Into Leaf-Piles!: ‘T may seem fun, but leaf-piles may hide animal droppings, or daggers. NOT WORTH THE LEAP.

5. Prepare For Rain!: No rain appears in thy weather-mancers’ predictions for the Kearney faire this week-end, but ‘tis always wise to prepare. Wear thy best hooded cloak, caparison, or cowl!

6. Learn Autumnal Songs!: The grandest joy of any faire, if one asked me, be MUSIC. Learn ye some Autumnal songs, that ye may spread that joy & join in on any spontaneous sing-songery! Songs such as: “Hærfest Is Icumen In”; “Hærfest Bells”; or “Greensleeves (Hærfest Mix).”

7. Avoid Angering The Autumnal Dæmon!: I shall not relay its name. Ye must not speak it, nor think it. Upset it not, lest ye face its wrath. Fear. Fear. FEAR.

I hope these advisements enhance thine Autumnal excursions, mortals! Thank ye for reading, & thank ye humbly to the growing gallery of generous mortals who can & do support our works here with coin!

Thanks to thy support, our conveyance was booked without delay or worry; we are full-stocked of provisions; & any unexpected travel costs we safely know shall not destroy our purses.

I hope ye shall join us Friday at 8PT for the behind-the-scenes stream! & if ye reside nearby Kearney Park, I hope we see ye at the faire this week-end! I shall write ye Saturday evening, with images & tales from our first day.

‘Til then—be safe, be well, & LIVE AUTUMNALLY.

Cheers,
Amœnus Franco
Wizard, Writer, Fall-Minded